Tomatoes. Um, maybe the smallest tomatoes you've ever seen, but there are quite a few of them.
Round my way 'soil' is actually sand. No, no exaggeration. We've been trying to build it up, but there's that niggling 'Gosh, we just put two hundred dollars worth of soil into a rental garden' feeling that stops me from doing anything really worthwhile. Next place round I'm building no dig beds, for sure.
Two. You do know how to sew a button on, right? Sewing over a matchstick, or a heavy darning needle, means that the thread is loose enough to allow you to pull the button out from the shirt a little and actually, you know, button the thing up.